“My mother has gone off again”, says this six-year-old girl who is a friend of my younger son. Out of generosity, I pick her up and send her back to and from school as a favor since she lived nearby.
“Your father leh?” I asked.
“Oh, he doesn’t come home anymore”, she says, nodding sadly.
“What-?”
“He lives in Singapore because he has to work there”, she explained.
I nod but inside, I felt my heart clenching. During those times when this little girl’s mother has to go off on another trip (mostly to China) for work, one of their relatives would have to hold fort. She must have a high-flying position in the company and earn an obscene amount of money but strangely enough, I am not at all envious of her.
You see, although the only place I can go in my career is from here to….here (?), I feel that my kids and me are a lucky bunch of people. We are together and we’re just happy that way, we’re stable and we’re just…you know, contented. We have enough dosh to keep us floating but not enough to send us all to Paris on an exotic holiday twice a year. But is that important? I don’t know.
Although I think an insane amount of money would be nice, it’s not my life mission. Position and wealth, to me, is secondary in life.
I am sure this is not something the parents of the child in question can help. Once they’re in that position, it’s hard to break out of it. Well, they can but I would assume that they would have to give up a whole damn lot of stuff to break out of it…something not a lot of people can or are willing to do.
“My mommy don’t want to go but her friend (boss, I think) keep asking her to go”, says the girl sadly.
I nod. “Well, work is work, dear”
When asked what’s my one single favorite thing to do in the world, I would usually name a whole list of things that I love to do when my work is not screaming at me. Something that takes my mind COMPLETELY off of everyday tasks and relaxes me. Take a guess what it is…. If you say ‘ reading ’, yes, I love reading (especially soppy love stories with lots of sex scenes, please. Hee hee hee ….) and I also love mystery novels but it’s not the first on the list. If you say ‘ playing the piano ’; yes, I love playing the piano. Creating forms a huge part of my life and whenever I play the piano (as inept at it as I am), there’s this tiny little girl inside of me jumping up and down with glee, clapping her hands. It’s my childhood dream to be able to play the piano! And thumping on the keys gives me a sense of satisfaction when I hear the music. If you say ‘ writing ’; You’ve got to be kidding me! You mean I don’t write enough as it is? Case closed. If you say ‘ playing with my kids ’; Yea...
Comments
As you've said, sometimes it is not the choice of the parents to travel in order to survive. I do a lot of travelling in the course of my work as well...I do all that with a heavy heart, just in order to survive.
I am lucky that my kids can rely on my wife and parents when I am away...that takes away some of the pressure of leaving home.
Neways, bottom line is " Home Is Where The Heart Is"...no one, given a choice would like to be away from their family....IF given a choice.