Out in the outdoors chased by monkeys

Been indoors the whole day Monday. It’s public holiday for everyone else in Malaysia but since I celebrate thanksgiving along with the rest of the Americans (most of my clients are US based), I have to work. So, the kids, with their pent-up energy have been bugging me all day long.

You know, can’t remember the last time I went outdoors to the parks and all that wor. Sad, isn’t it? Don’t even have time to sit down on the toilet throne these days. How to go outside and enjoy the sun?

But finally, out of desperation to get the kids out of my hair, exited the house, bought two loaves of bread and a huge bottle of mineral water then headed out to nearby BIG park. We don’t have that many nice parks around in the country, actually, but this one is very well-maintained and complete.

Was surprised that there are additional visitors there now other than joggers, walkers, kids and old people doing tai-chi. Monkeys wor! Monkeys are very scary to me because they look an awful lot like us and yet they’re animals. So, me and the kids are tearing up pieces of bread to feed the birds, fishes and turtles in the pond. Enjoying ourselves as we watch the turtles fight with the fishes for the pieces of bread.

Unbeknownst to us, an army (AND I REALLY MEAN AN ARMY) of monkeys trooped their way out of nearby forest and into the park. They lounged around like they owned the park scaring the shit out of people and the kids. I heard monkeys bite, you know. Anyway, I didn’t realize all of that was happening because we were too happily feeding the tame animals.

Joshua and Jared turned their attention to the birds who realized that we had a lot of bread with us. Jared not very good with throwing far so he was throwing the bread at his feet and the birds had to hop their way nearer to us. We backed, Jared throws at his feet, birds hopped nearer, we backed, Jared throws at his feet again….etc. Suddenly, a bunch of monkeys realized that we had bread. I saw a huge monkey eye my plastic bag, Joshua and Jared holding HUGE pieces of bread and I froze.

“Throw the bread!”, I barked at my kids. The kids were frozen with fear and the crouching monkeys were eyeing us. As a couple of the monkeys started to run towards us, I slapped the bread out of Joshua’s hands, grabbed both of them and retreated into the crowd. One of them grabbed the fallen bread and ate it. The others kept advancing and the crowd of people started retreating behind me. I followed the monkey’s gaze and it was looking at Jared who was STILL HOLDING THE BREAD!

Gargh!!!!

I grabbed the bread and threw it into the crowd of monkeys behind and ran! Amongst the crowd, I looked back and saw all of them fighting with each other for the piece of bread. I dropped my huge bottle of mineral water when running for dear life and now I refused to pick it up….too near to the monkeys! A man asked me, “That’s your water, isn’t it?” I nod in bereavement….we’ll go thirsty for a while, never mind.

“I don’t dare to get it lor now” I, sheepishly, told him.

“I go get it for you, ok?”

Suddenly he looked like MacGyver to me! He retrieved my bottle of water for me unharmed. And I smiled a huge lovely smile at him and thanked him fervently.

Phew!

Anyway, despite the monkey incident, we had fun playing in the makeshift stream, the playground and just walking around in the park. Seeing smiling people and listening to kids laughing….sigh. We should do this more often.

But next time, I am going to bring a gun. I am gonna blardie shoot the monkeys!