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Women We Can

woman in high heels walking up the stairs


Being a woman is tough. No, I am not saying being a man is not. It's just that, when put into a bad situation, women often have a harder time climbing out of the abyss. We are discriminated against, have to swim against the tide, the obstacles are higher and harder, and it's harder to find support to get us through. 

I've been there and sometimes, I surprise myself for making it this far. But the women who actually receive support for their effort to climb out of the abyss, the black hole, deserves out recognition and applaud. 

In the workplace, we face gender discrimination, pay inequality, sexual harassment, an of course, being given stereotyped positions. And if we were to be more of an assertive type, the journey to the top may be tougher than the ones men face. 

We may also think this is a thing of the past but married women who have an intention to get pregnant and start a family, they don't really stand a chance against a driven man with a passion and goal to make things happen for the company that they work for. 

Although there are more single fathers now than before, single mothers face more discrimination and can sometimes be labeled as 'the one who caused the failure of their marriages'. 

Like it or not, it still happens although things are still a little under wraps, and people whisper behind your back instead of telling it to your face. 

I recently had this conversation, nonchalantly and as a by-stander, where there was a discussion about a female applicant around the age of 28 who must have mistakenly said that she wanted to have children in the next couple of years. The guys took her application slip and placed it at the bottom of the pile. 

I've also watched how colleagues congratulate men about her wife's pregnancy while giving the side-eye to a pregnant female employee, offering her no such treatment. They actively discussed when she was due and when her maternity leave would start and end. 

As a single mother, I've had my set of challenges. The list is too long. But whenever my child(red) misbehaved, despite my ex-husband being there, all accusing eyes were on me. It was as if to say Gosh, what kind of mother is she? An awful one, that's what. 

In a traditional household, when something was wrong, it would be me, the mother, who had to shoulder every single task related to raising my kids. The father would be sitting on the couch, watching a football game, sipping on a can of beer, flipping through the channel...and yet, it was the mother who had to rush to the scene. All of this while I was also a working woman. 

I don't think things will change any time soon, sadly. The burden of raising children, and the discriminatory nature in a conventional workplace will probably not end just because we've been harping on it since forever. 

The pros to this situation is that BECAUSE of it, women have learned to take it in their stride and become stronger and more resilient people. 

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