I've been on this journey for close to two years now and I am still not used to this. But that's the reason I threw myself off this cliff in the first place, knowing it is a territory that I would need to learn how to navigate again.
But when I started this journey, there were a few conditions I set for myself:
1. I wanted to feel belonged
2. I have to be working on things that made me feel fulfilled or satisfied
3. The people I would inevitably surround myself with have to share my vision and mision. Nothing is going to be perfect, that much I know, but at the very least, working with people who had the same style and personality as me is top priority.
4. I don't want to deal with authoritarians every single day.
5. I would have to learn how to socially adapt myself to groups of people again and if my gut instincts told me that it is not the right group of people, I would have to get out.
6. The very nature, the very core of what we do on an everyday basis has to be a juggernaut towards the betterment of human beings.
They're right when they say everything takes time and every now and again, you will fall. And then you would have to learn how to pick yourself up again.
Because I didn't do all of this to stay down (although I do stay down for quite a bit - lol). I came all this way to learn how to find a non-judgmental hand I can grab onto whenever I tumble ass over teakettle.
I also realize that it was time I moved on. People have some things to say about my relationship with my now-adult children. I don't want to be a burden that they will carry with them as they try to navigate their a world on their own and finding their calling.
I am not a part of their calling. I should not be. I want to be the refuge they come back to whenever they face something in life (good or bad), not the constant shelter that they seek out when they are in torpor.
During the journey, I've met impossible people. Seriously! Like wow!
I wish them well, with all my heart, because everyone's got a story and I don't know theirs.
So, yeah....I figured I needed to update this blog today because it warrants so.
The key message I would like to convey to anyone reading this, IF ANYONE is reading it at all is that once you've set your mind on going on the journey, mind not the obstacles and people who do not share your vision.
Everyone's doing it for themselves, not you. And we don't all share the same perception. And even if they do, they come from a different space. The best we can do is to try to understand them and let them go.
Things can get scary but don't give up. Keep standing up.
Happy Sunday, people of the world. Make it worthwhile.