My life stopped at the age of 26...when I had my first child and I am not saying this in a negative way. It stopped revolving around me, my passion, my interest, my friends, my original family, my life. It started revolving around those tiny people in diapers and I mapped my life around them. Nothing else mattered.
It has been a long time since my decisions are based on myself.
And I have come to a phase in my life whereby I am handed back the reign, one string at the time, to let go of that revolving Universe.
OK, fine. Enough drama. My kids are growing up.
I have spent the last few days bring thrown into a world of unknown parenting. They went into a deep, dark jungle and riverside (near Hulu Langat, that's all I know. I asked for GPS location, actually but was ignored so, I spent the entire night breathing into a plastic bag till around 2.45am in the morning, not kidding) where there's no electricity without me. They went to malls without me. They went to a pool party without me. I am trying to loosen my iron grip and stop thinking that I control everything. I am not in control of any effing thing right now except for the food and drinks that they eat. Even then, that's questionable. lol
I know I have an iron grip, it's a good and bad thing but as I said earlier, my life stopped at the age of 26 and that's been a long time since I have been in complete control of almost every situation involving these people. It's not easy to let go. I tell myself people send their kids to boarding schools and military for, crissakes, Marsha, get it together!!!!!
I try. I need caffeine and medication. And some wine. lol
So, if your kid is still being potty trained or is really small right now and you think you have his or her life mapped out, you are in for a ride, my friend.
Me? I have to start thinking the thoughts that I had when I was 26 so that I can start picking up the pieces from where I left off at 27.
Heavily medicated mom,
Love,
Marsha
It has been a long time since my decisions are based on myself.
And I have come to a phase in my life whereby I am handed back the reign, one string at the time, to let go of that revolving Universe.
OK, fine. Enough drama. My kids are growing up.
I have spent the last few days bring thrown into a world of unknown parenting. They went into a deep, dark jungle and riverside (near Hulu Langat, that's all I know. I asked for GPS location, actually but was ignored so, I spent the entire night breathing into a plastic bag till around 2.45am in the morning, not kidding) where there's no electricity without me. They went to malls without me. They went to a pool party without me. I am trying to loosen my iron grip and stop thinking that I control everything. I am not in control of any effing thing right now except for the food and drinks that they eat. Even then, that's questionable. lol
I know I have an iron grip, it's a good and bad thing but as I said earlier, my life stopped at the age of 26 and that's been a long time since I have been in complete control of almost every situation involving these people. It's not easy to let go. I tell myself people send their kids to boarding schools and military for, crissakes, Marsha, get it together!!!!!
I try. I need caffeine and medication. And some wine. lol
So, if your kid is still being potty trained or is really small right now and you think you have his or her life mapped out, you are in for a ride, my friend.
Me? I have to start thinking the thoughts that I had when I was 26 so that I can start picking up the pieces from where I left off at 27.
Heavily medicated mom,
Love,
Marsha