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2012 Merdeka Quietly Celebrated

Frankly, it's not that I have anything against celebrating Merdeka day, Malaysia's independence day, I don't. But I have grown accustomed to scoffing at news, and reading unbelievable stuff that you can't expect me to jump up with joy, make a grab for a Malaysian flag and wave it madly in the air with joy. All these days, we have celebrated Merdeka feeling trapped and not knowing what to expect next, giving up, hoping, wondering, feeling downtrodden, and worried all at the same time.

You know, at the back of my mind, I DO go 'I should, you know. I SHOULD make an effort to be more patriotic, it is my country, after all' but I can't. I feel like an actor and an insincere person if I do that. Harlow, been told how many times that we do not belong here. Try being brainwashed with that and still love your country and see.

What with the leaders in our country turning a blind eye and a deaf ear to the cries of the rakyat. When we needed you, there was no protection and assurance. There was only the back of these ministers pretending not to hear anything.

But anyway, celebrated Merdeka as usual, quietly at home enjoying the presence and love of people who love me and me them.

Nevertheless, I still feel somewhat proud to be a Malaysian, NOT BECAUSE OF THE COUNTRY but because some of the most amazing people are right here in our home soil. I celebrate the people.

Happy Merdeka, Malaysians,

p.s. One day, I hope to really wave the real thing with all of my heart! Peace.


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