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The Malaysian Tweeter

Warning: If you are prim and proper and wear all Prada, this warning is for you. If you are a staunch English language writer/speaking/user/skeptic/critic, then this warning is also for you. If the worst swear word you ever write or say is 'Oh my god', this warning is, once again, also for you.

OK, now don't say I didn't warn you!
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Sometimes I feel very torn when using online social networking tools. Why? Because I feel the pull of being a proper writer who writes proper English and a Malaysian. You see, as with all other countries, we all have our own version of English. For example, in Hong Kong, people call the bus, bus-si. Where the 'si' comes from, we all don't know. In Malaysia, we have lots of others. Like 'lah', 'wor', 'nia', 'geh', 'lor', 'kua', 'ma'....lots more where THAT came from.

As most of you know, my business comes to me online. People find me online because I write damn a lot...well, I used to write damn a lot.

(How come there are no swear words yet geh? Hehehe....)

So, sometimes, I feel apprehensive about being me...the real me...the Malaysian Marsha me and if you look to the right side-bar properly, I have had to explain myself a lot of times that this is not the way I write, this is not the way I write, this is not the way I write....this is my BLOG!! :-)

The funny thing is that although I do not swear aloud in real life (hardly ever except when intoxicated or under duress), I think it makes me a lot more human being I speak the way real Malaysians do.

I mean, you know someone is an American when they tweet words like 'Holler your way Nigga! Imma going mad! There's this hoe here looking fer ya!!'

I have yet to distinguish Brits or Australians. Hehehe....

Bringing it back to Malaysians. We like to say things like, 'Wah, here raining sipek jialat' (invasion of Hokkien influence) which basically means that 'it is MF raining here'. And we also like to say things like 'Jalan Damansara is tak boleh jalan lor' (Malay-Cantonese infusion) which means 'Jalan Damansara (a street name) is very jammed up'.

But then again, there are very simple infusion that does not involve any foreign language: 'You think your father's road ah?!' (Please ignore the 'ah' in the end because it basically serves no purpose WHATSOEVER. The statement means 'Do you think this is your father's road?' but when a Malaysian says this, he/she is not really asking you if this road belongs to your father. He/she is telling you to GET THE EFF OUT OF THE WAY! or you're acting like you have proprietorial rights to a building, land but more commonly, roads.

Other less polite Malaysian words are used, also, very regularly like 'tulan' which means, literally, cow's balls but it is not really referring to cow's balls at all. It simply means that when this person is tulan, he is angry or frustrated. Because Twitter limits us to only 140 characters in total in a tweet, we resort to abbreviations. Or maybe it is more polite to use abbreviations - the excuse, choose one lah.

Often, I find tweeters tweet things like 'KNN' (eff you) or the longer one 'KNNLLBCCB' (very rude reference to your mother, ruder than MF - for some reason, I can't spell out the sentence for MF because....well....HARLOW, I am a mother!!!). 'KNS' is also another popular one.

Anyway, with all that said and done, please do not judge me. Although I am no elitist, I am not an uncouth influence on kids (including mine - Nintendos are ripped from their grasps even when the word S*HT is spoken).

The point is - do I tweet as I am, the Malaysian or the Writer? Sometimes I confuse myself.

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