Resist

I went for a massage just now and boy, did I need one! Oh, I wasn't being lazy lah...it was because TNB had to work on some maintenance things here, so, I have no choice but to sit in the dark....with only my phone for entertainment. There was this darkness....with nothing to do. Only the toilet working...and I don't think playing with the toilet is a good idea at all.

So, I ask myself, 'What would make me really happy right now?'

The answer came to me almost instantly. A MASSAGE WOULD BE DANG NEAR BE HEAVENLY!

So, a massage it was. After hitting the wrong shoplot for the third time, I finally found one near my house. The one thing I loved about walking in is:-

1. The wonderful smell of aromatherapy
2. Three people leaped to their feet all at the same time. I thought they could see through the glass? Ah well. 

I chose the short 30mins back massage because good lord, my back, shoulders and neck was killing me. It always kills me because I sit here everyday typing with my shoulders hunched and my spine in a terribly hurtful position. I remind myself that I should sit properly when I work but I forget that too often. When I check myself, I am back to the Hunchback of Notre Dame posture. 

This goes on the whole day when I am sitting here. 

So, what's interesting about this massage session is this. I like the guy masseur. Two, I learned something about life. I know, I keep learning about life through the simple things and actions that I see and observe in myself and in others!

This guy was intent on making the most out of the 30 minutes that I am paying for, you see, so, he played a little rough. Whenever he got a little rough, I would tense up and it would cause me immeasurable pain. At one point in time, he was like trying to change the shape of my shoulders or something! Every massage session is/was a torture in a way. 

But he said in a soft voice, in mandarin, 'Fung Soong, siow jier. Ni pu fung soong hui hen thung tek.' (Relax, miss. If you don't relax, it can get painful) You don't say....why do you think I am tensing myself up??? Because it's pleasurable???

I tried, damn it, to relax! I dropped my shoulders only to find myself pulling them up again, bracing myself for the onslaught of his fingers, forearm and elbow. 

He repeated his advice a couple of times and I got to a point that I thought that I must be crazy to come here and think that I would actually be more relaxed in the end. Like a light shining through in the darkness, at his final request for me to relax, I breathed in deeply and started to stop intentionally giving myself spasm. 

With each breath, the pain ebbed away. Like a miracle!! Like, it doesn't hurt anymore. At all. 

With me being face down on the table with my face fitted into the hole, I suddenly realized something. Human beings react to things with resistance. Before going for a meeting with your boss, you put up a defense mechanism which is protect you in ever your boss were to attack you. 

We wake up every morning and prepare for battle...to resist and protect ourselves from harm, pain and hurtful things. 

To resist something causes more pain. Like have you ever had a tough time in the toilet before? The harder you try, the less the likelihood that you will....oh, that's gross. Anyway, you get the picture. 

The more I relaxed and breathed through the massage, the more I enjoyed it. The more welcoming I am towards his hands, I am moved into a new position. My muscles relaxed, my mind opened up to the softening of my painful shoulder and neck muscles. 

Now that I know how to actually enjoy this thing and not endure it so much, I think this is the start of a new addiction. Hehehe...