Skip to main content

Looking For Love

The other day, I saw someone who reminded me about a lot of girls when I was younger. I'll stop beating around the bush and say, 'Yes, yes, yes...she reminds me of me as well' but the fact of the matter is that I outgrew that and she is still that way despite being only a couple of years younger than me. I guess some people are just stuck in the Looking For Love (LFL) mode all life long, you think so? OK, let me get this straight, there is nothing wrong with looking for love because love is everything. But when you are looking for love in the wrong form, then there IS something wrong. Without going on and on about how wrong this person can be, let's just say that she is looking for love in a man. She is looking for a man to complete her life, to complete her dreams, to fill her bed, to make her feel whole again. Without that man, she feels that her life is worthless. She thinks that with the man, she will find a dream life....she will spend days being adored and loved. He will worship the ground she walks on. She will wake up in his arms with a smile and they languidly spend the rest of their days together waiting for the sun rise and then coming home to see the sun set. Every other day, there is a rainbow just right outside their window. Bollocks. Oh, great. Now you think I am this aging woman harboring bitter thoughts about love and men. Oh..but you can be so wrong because I love this!! :-) Anyway, here's what I think. I think love starts from within. You love outwardly and not looking for it from the outside in. Confusing? It simply means that you have to love yourself first. Nothing else matters because you are the most important thing in the world. In her own words, she doesn't think she means much without that man she is looking for. She thinks she is ugly because no one seems to like her, accept her for who she is and no one is keen on massaging her feet before she sleeps. Basically, she is living in a state of FML all the time. We were drinking and you know people do stupid things when they are drunk. She was. One moment, I thought John was her boyfriend because they held onto each other in a tight embrace. The next moment, appears that Jason is her boyfriend because they were almost snogging. You know men....they don't let an opportunity like that go and the mentality is always 'why not??!! she's offering, ain't she?'. The next moment, Chuck is stuck too. But she's on the hunt and it appears that any man will do. In fact, it dawned on me that if a woman is all she is left with, she'll take the woman. Sigh....ask any single man and he will tell you that the moment you start to behave like he is the lifeline, the instinct is to run for the Appalachian mountain. Or at least Gunung Ledang. In short, she is saying that she is not existing for herself. She is merely here on a hunt for the right man to complete her life. Bother. Telling her that she is beautiful, talented, funny and unique in her own way is not going to cut it because she believes in the fact that fulfillment can only be found outside of herself. You can't really help someone like that – she is the only person who can make her see her own worth. Ah well. We all have to go through it the hard way. No better teacher than f*cking things up on your own, they say.

Comments

misty windows said…
sometimes we didn't look for it. not looking for it, wouldn't be looking for it and definitely can't go on looking for it. but things do happen in the most peculiar way and present itself in the most hopeless circumstances. when it does, it can be a very crucial test how strong it is. for nothing else really matters.

Popular posts from this blog

Stargazer - Stretch Those Sides

I have been doing this pose, part of Cosmic Dance (a type of yoga, I am assuming), called Stargazer pose without knowing it is called Stargazer's pose a lot in the past. You see, sometimes, I don't follow the rules and come up with my own stretches and poses. It is fun. I have on some music, nice, soothing music or just anything I can click on. Then I go with the flow, letting my hair down. Just moving to the music...and that is when I come up with the above Stargazer's pose. This pose really stretches your sides. Keep your eyes on the outstretched hand if you are keeping it pointed to the top, as if you are waving or connecting to a higher energy from the Universe. Your arms will ache a little but hey, toned arms, here you come! :-) For those who want a bigger stretch, it is safe to slowly and gently move the lifted hand towards your back...don't overdo it, listen to your body's complaints and respect it. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, reme

Maid Side-Kick

I was kind of a little sad when I read the news about this - there will be no live-in Indonesian maids in Malaysia anymore . There are pros and cons to having a live-in maid, as with everything else, but for us, we enjoyed more pros than cons. Back then, when my kids were little, we brought in a family of maids to help with...well, just about everything, and we were like two families merged into one. They ate what we ate, we sleep, they sleep, we shop, they shop, they joke, we laugh, we joke, they laugh...for me, the maid I hired was more like a sister and side-kick to me. For that few years, I was dependent on her to mind-read my schedule and when I need or don't need help. She picked things up quickly and we ended up having lots of moments whereby we were in sync. Today, two of them are on my Facebook and we were gleefully chatting over Facebook Messenger since they've just discovered the wonders of the Internet and Social Media. Since we were more like partners in crim

Project Wolf Hunting (2022) - Film Review

Less than 10 minutes into the movie, I was already wondering why am I watching this show, and in the dead of the night.  But I was thinking to myself, I've toughened up quite a bit when it comes to things like these... Happiness , Signal , Sweet Home , Alice in Borderland , Vagabond , City Hunter , Tunnel ...these crime and sci-fi dramas and films I endured just so that I can watch my favorite actors in action...they must have really built me some mental muscles.  Usually, I am the late kind because I want to see what everyone has to say about it...so that I am prepared.  I will just present you with reasons to watch and reasons NOT to. Here goes.  REASONS TO WATCH If you like Seo In Guk , Jung So Min , Jang Dong Yoon , Sung Dong Il , or maybe even Im Ju Hwan , you might want to endure this film.  Hint : If you're a fan of Jang Dong Yoon, maybe watch it.  It's interesting. I know we have a lot of post apocalyptic world films all over the place now but this is a little diffe