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Houston, We've Got A Prob. Alien Bug On Board

But it was a valiant fight to the end. I fought and fought and fought with water, sleep and vitamins and yet, the aliens were much stronger than I am. I thought that I could at least scare them into just giving me a little bit of a cough....
*cough cough*
.....but the alien bug leader was the true hero in the end. He cornered me with extra work load and made sure my eyes were glued to the computer while he attacked me from behind. By the time I turned around to....
*ah-choo!*
....see him with his vaporizer trained right at my temple, it was too late. But he did not kill me yet. Said that he will make me suffer before he will let me have the privilege of dying. With his gun poking into the small of my back, he pushed me into the kitchen and....
*cough* *AH-CHHOOOOOOOO!!!!!*
....and made me cook food for the kids. And that wasn't the end of it all....not so soon. I managed to send out an S.O.S to Houston but they told me that there was nothing they could do that was fast enough to stop the invasion....Houston....they've abandoned me. 
*cough cough*
So, here I am typing out my last blog post, telling this sad tale of mine so that people will know how hard I fought against the bastard aliens. He is watching me as I am typing this making sure that my kids have done their homework. 
I told the alien that I have to go out to purchase some personal stuff that I cannot ask a man in his right mind to buy for me, something I can't even ask my neighbor for because of fear of embrassment, but he said NO. 
*AH-CHOOOOOOO!!!!*
Goodbye my friends, goodbye my beloved, beloved friends. Goodbye earth. 
*pengsan*
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