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Wa Si Cui Gu

I didn’t know that wa si cui gu until I had to write some Chinese New Year advertisement copy, you know. I look look look and see…..KNN, no wonder my life so pitiful lah….I am a farking water buffalo mah…how not to have a hard life??!! Anyway, in the spirit of celebrating me being a water buffalo, I’m going to look into the good points of a water buffalo who is traditionally believed to have to work to their deaths. They say:The Water element gives the Ox a flexibility and liberty. Me say: Mmmmm….no wonder I don’t want to work for people and end up being a freelancer with all the flexibility that I want. They say:….hard-working…blah blah blha, quickest-thinking Me say: Er….hard-working maybe-lah but quickest-thinking….er….maybe not lah hor? They say: easily recognize and accept other people’s point of view…. Me say: (continue from above sentence):…until treated like a doormat. Oh yes…. They say: …their sincerity and patience ensures their popularity with friends, peers and family. Me say: I am happy to see that I am popular amongst so many people but I have my doubts. Define popular... They say: Oxen….start their families early on and completely immerse themselves in caring for and parenting their children. Me say: Aiya! No wonder lah… They say: This can lead to dependent children and can pose a problem for parents who are trying to teach their children to become self-reliant. Me say: Oh. Hee hee hee…. They say: They like art and music as well. They are creative children who enjoy sports too. Me say: NO FARKING WONDER lah!!! Then the list damn kow long, I don’t wanna read liao. I went straight for the compatibility thing. I picked out the matches for my past boyfriends/husband(s)/flings/almost-slept-with…some only lah and this is what they had to say… They say: Ox and Rooster Sexually stimulating, passionate and spontaneous…this should be a good fit. Me say: I would like to cast a little bit of doubt here. It depends on what kind of rooster we’re talking about here, right? If he’s an earth farking rooster or a fire rooster, then this water buffalo stand no chance lor. They say: Ox and Dragon Give-and-take is not your forte and you are both more stubborn than the other. Me say: Hee hee hee….what can I say? :-) They say: Ox and Tiger You are completely drawn to each other but headed for a dead end. Me say: Should have read this earlier…waste my time. They say: Ox and Rat Really good sex, but you’ll better serve each other as an affair. Marriage isn’t a good idea. Me say: Good sex, questionable. Please define good sex…. It didn’t say anything about me having to work hard for the rest of my life wor. But they did say that 2009 is going to be one shitty year for me because this year is earth element mah….water touch earth disappear wan mah. So, all you people out there who are water buffalo like me, watch out. Don’t disappear into the earth.
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