Do you know when was the last time I actually took SUPPER? S.U.P.P.E.R. The word was erased from my dictionary and obliterated from my life since....since....I dunno....eight, nine, no....twelve years ago? I. NEVER. EAT. SUPPER! NEVER!!! Not even when you place my favorite char-siew-farn or korn-low-meen in front of me. Nope, no way, no siree, no thankyou.
But today, I ate two bowls of Hokkien mee and I think I am dying already.
I am fatter (I don't care that it's PMS time) as I am writing this and can you hear that? That sound is the sluggish chugging on my cholesterol-infected arteries. It's clogging up, I'm telling ya! I'm dying. I'm dying! I'm dddyyyiiinnnnngggg......
All because of that stupid Hokkien Mee seller, I tell you. If not for the bugger, I wouldn't dying so young.
Don't tell me to get a grip because if I add on a single pound tonight and it shows tomorrow, I'm going to plant a bomb in the Hokkien Mee seller's wok. Be warned, my fellow homo sapien friends, be warned!!!
Turn around when you see Hokkien Mee and then run for your life. Scurry away as fast as your legs would carry you....let the wind take you to a Hokkien Mee-less place where healthy arteries sing.
Hokkien Mee....you ain't seen the last of me!!! Growl....
Oh. Maybe you have.
If you don't hear from me tomorrow, and I am not dead, I am probably playing an extra round of badminton trying to work the Hokkien Mee off my butt.