Skip to main content

The Onion and The Christmas Tree

Believe it or not, my AUNT sent me this..... ***

The family is sitting at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?' The father, surprised, answers, 'Well son, there's three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round & firm. In her thirties & forties, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions.' 'Onions?' 'Yes, you see them, and they make you cry.'

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter says, 'Mom, how many types of 'willies' are there?' The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 'Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willie is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties & forties, it's like a birch tree, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree.' 'A Christmas tree??'

'Yes dear, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only.'

***

Have yourself a Supercalifragilisticexpialidocous day ahead!
Labels:

Comments

Jamie said…
I like that men are like Christmas Trees thingy...HAHAHAHAHAHA...for decor only woh...HAHAHAHAHAHA

but the joke forgot to say that breast at 50 can act as a warmer as well...you know the warmer thingy cuz? the thingy that you fling around your neck to keep warm during cold days ( maybe Judy knows better ).

Here's how is goes:
Take the left breast and fling across the left shoulder and wrap it around the neck to leave it hanging on the right side. Do the same for the right breast and WAHLAH...a natural neck warmer...no destruction of forest or killing of animals in the making...

Good huh? kekekekekkeke
September 20, 2007 at 1:39 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Stargazer - Stretch Those Sides

I have been doing this pose, part of Cosmic Dance (a type of yoga, I am assuming), called Stargazer pose without knowing it is called Stargazer's pose a lot in the past. You see, sometimes, I don't follow the rules and come up with my own stretches and poses. It is fun. I have on some music, nice, soothing music or just anything I can click on. Then I go with the flow, letting my hair down. Just moving to the music...and that is when I come up with the above Stargazer's pose. This pose really stretches your sides. Keep your eyes on the outstretched hand if you are keeping it pointed to the top, as if you are waving or connecting to a higher energy from the Universe. Your arms will ache a little but hey, toned arms, here you come! :-) For those who want a bigger stretch, it is safe to slowly and gently move the lifted hand towards your back...don't overdo it, listen to your body's complaints and respect it. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, reme...
Post a Comment
Read more

Maid Side-Kick

I was kind of a little sad when I read the news about this - there will be no live-in Indonesian maids in Malaysia anymore . There are pros and cons to having a live-in maid, as with everything else, but for us, we enjoyed more pros than cons. Back then, when my kids were little, we brought in a family of maids to help with...well, just about everything, and we were like two families merged into one. They ate what we ate, we sleep, they sleep, we shop, they shop, they joke, we laugh, we joke, they laugh...for me, the maid I hired was more like a sister and side-kick to me. For that few years, I was dependent on her to mind-read my schedule and when I need or don't need help. She picked things up quickly and we ended up having lots of moments whereby we were in sync. Today, two of them are on my Facebook and we were gleefully chatting over Facebook Messenger since they've just discovered the wonders of the Internet and Social Media. Since we were more like partners in crim...
Post a Comment
Read more

Drunk People Cannot Make Comments on Blogs

OK, here's the thing with this image thing....you don't want people to design robots or programs or spiders or cockroaches or whatever to spam blogs and websites. I understand that. In fact, I am all for it. It's annoying to have spambots come in and post one liners like.... Can't get it up? Try this website. Top quality Viagra for low pricing. Value discount if bought inbulk. Or the most common ones would be.... Want a completely paid-for holiday with your family and coming home to a villa beside the sea before taking a spin in your luxury car. Then you have to read this! It's amazing! Within three weeks, you will get $32,000 in your account. Within a month, whether you like it or not, we'll bank in $65,498 into your bank account. Within six months, you're a f*%#@* royalty. I don't like that....and I assuming you don't like that either, right? If you have a popular blog, you get even worse stuff like hate mails, awful comments or people who ...
2 comments
Read more