It's been some time since I spent some time updating this blog so, I thought today, a precious Saturday (before I start toiling in the kitchen again), would be a good day.
This whole pandemic thing has been really frustrating for some of us. Single parents who have no backup, trust me, are suffering. There were times when I was immensely (and I am using this word very kindly) frustrated that:
- This was my forties? Really?
- This is the kind of introduction my kids are getting to adulthood?
- What kind of college life is this?
- I just want to get out again
- I want to do whatever I want without fear again, GDI
- We feel like prisoners or criminals
- We are using the internet too much
- Outside meals shouldn't be THIS damn hard to order or buy
- Buying groceries - hello! Why do we have to rush every single day to get supplies when we have to work? They say it closes at 8pm but we get off work at 6pm. Discount travel time, it gives us about an hour to get both dinner and groceries. And we're not allowed to take more than one other person with us during the trip, which means I have to go home and grab one son (which takes time)
- When is this ever going to end?
- Convenience stores? Hello! It's not called a convenience store if it is no longer convenient. Might as well shop in any other store, am I right?
- Average things - you want to buy thumbtacks for an art project? Well....
I still try to look for the silver lining every day despite feeling flustered, harried, and at times, distressed.
With politics in shambles now for Malaysia (I don't like the so-called newly-appointed PM, BTW), it seems that a new relaxed policy was announced yesterday or the day before.
Coincidentally, my boys were getting their second dose vaccinations and I was like "Yeah...!!!! But no, wait...."
So, what's the SOP now? Are going to be, like, going to a cafe to get cakes and then cuffed all of a sudden because, who knows, something changed along the way? Or is it going to be a situation where we think we're safe and then wham-bam we're positive for COVID and back in quarantine or worse.
A relative and 2 friends did not survive COVID.
Before this, it seemed like a very far-off situation where it happened to someone else. A number or an unnamed person I read about in the news. We were safe and in control if we just did what the officials told us.
Mask up, sanitize, don't go out unless necessary, adhere to Standard Operating Procedures, fist bump don't shake, meet online if possible, don't travel...the likes.
It's closer than we think.
We did all of that, and yet, I don't feel safe at all going out NOW. Not yet, anyway. We need some kind of in-between regulation, new SOPs, to help us navigate our way back into normalcy (or whatever new normalcy it will be).
I still have one shot of vaccination left to go (soon) but even then, I feel cautious. As ad nauseum as the lockdown has been for the past 2 years, I want to be normal again but I don't want to put our lives in danger.
In other countries, people may have no qualms about throwing their masks away the moment the government lifted the lockdowns. But for me, it will take me some time to become more comfortable about the flippant laws (possibly politically-motivated) passed and announced to sugar-coat things for us.
My birthday was at the end of July and it wasn't ideal, of course, like every one else's during the pandemic, and I DO want to have a normal gathering with my family and friends again but...
I think I'm gonna hold onto my horses for a bit and ease getting back to normal even after being vaccinated and cleared with a digital certificate.
Meanwhile, I am going to continue exploring doing online stuff (as a part of my job and also just for fun)
XOXO,
Marsha
Marsha
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