What the herwl this person wants lah?

I was in ToysRus looking for last minute Christmas for the kids, minding my own business. Boring lah, you know, Christmas shopping can be. Jared was pestering me about buying him some Pokemon, Power Ranger and something else I cannot remember liao. But I reminded him that he pre-ordered his Christmas present which was a Nintendo DS he shares with Joshua. I think that Nintendo DS already bust a budget here and there – so, I told them that they forfeit their regular Christmas present lor. Joshua was fine with that….erm, Jared is having a little bit of trouble understanding the concept of ‘forfeit’.

I was carrying this transformable robot thing with me for a nephew when a man suddenly approached me, poking at the robot box. “Where’d you get that, Miss? It looks pretty cool”. This is an elderly man who was holding a more expensive and funky looking robot toy, dark skinned, pot-bellied, moustache-y fella with glasses. At first glance, he looks like a father to a teenage boy. I pointed out where I got the robot set and tried to be helpful cause he looked a little lost.

Then he struck a conversation pulak.

“Miss, you’re a very nice person and I am from India. I work with the airlines, you see, and I don’t have that many friends here”

“Which airlines?”

“Air India. I stay at a hotel in ***” “You don’t have a residence here?”

I know a lot of airline people staying opposite my condo which is a hive for air stewards, stewardesses, pilots, cabin crews and such. This fella don’t look like a steward for sure, if yes, I will never fly Air India. And anyway, the authenticity of his claim is still in question.

“No, no, no. I come very often but every time I come, we stay a few days in hotels”….which is funny because they he comes so often, wouldn’t it be more cost-effective for the company to just rent a home here for the people?

“Hhhhmmm….oh, OK, good luck with the toy, then. For your son?”

“Yes, for my son in India”

“OK, see ya around” – standard greeting or goodbye line, right?

“Yes, why not? When can I see you around?”

???????????

“No, I mean…..yeah, like any time”

“Oh, then can I have your number?”

?????????!!!!!!!

“Give me your number”

“I don’t have a number here. I am staying in a hotel” – hhmmmm….come here often? No cell phone number?

“Your email address, then”

“Oh, I am not into all those stuff. But I can probably get my wife to iron that out for me” – wife check email from female stranger from another country? Do I really look like a Ding-Dong or what????

Jared was still harping on about the Power Ranger toy, pulling out my cell phone from my back pocket to show me how displeased he is with me. Out dropped from business cards from my pocket. I picked them up, shot Jared a killer stare and passed the Indian man a card.

“Ok, here’s my card. Bye”

Incredulous, I watched him read my card while I was trying to remember if I have stated my address in the card. Phew….takda (don’t have)!

“Can I give you a call in the morning? Say….10 o’clock?”

“Huh? What’s the rush?” – No, I really said that. As in raised eyebrows saying what’s-the-fucking-rush? Maybe he’s in the network marketing thing or something?

“How about 2pm after lunch?”

“Whatever. Look I have to go. See ya a….I mean, bye. Gotta go!”

I scurried off with my tail between my legs.

***

Next afternoon. 2pm after lunch. Phone rang and it was really this farker, you know! He started off with a nice little ‘hi’ and that how was my morning and such frivolous niceties. I entertain….waiting for him to hit lower below the belt.

He kena with….. “Can we come out for a short chat or something….say tomorrow?”

“Listen, I don’t usually go out with strangers for no reason. I am not so liberal with such things. Even my mother’s got to make appointment to see me and my kids, I don’t think I have the time for this” Farker!

“Oh, I know.It’s not like that, BABE. Don’t take it like that”

Babe???!!!!! TIU NIA MA CHOW HAI. Nobody in this world calls me BABE! My blood is really boiling this time!

For some reason, the line was cut.

Phone ring again.

“Yes?” I answer. I want to give this farker a piece of mind and turn him into chee-cheong-fun if he dares call me babe again. At the back of my mind, I was thinking, maybe I heard wrong.

“So, how about it, tomorrow afternoon. Just for a short while, babe. Very quick and it’ll be very quiet”

QUIET???? Babe again? If I were to go out with a ‘FRIEND’, I would want to make it as loud as possible! Why quiet? What’s to hide? If I were to go out with a male friend, which sometimes I do, I make sure I parade the friend all around….despite their discomfort. I don’t care if there’s nothing to hide. But quiet?????

This bloody farker is really asking for it.

“First, don’t call me babe because I met you for 5 minutes only. Two, call me only when your intentions are genuine. I am not into these things, Mister. Really. I hope to end this on a good note, but I MIGHT CONSIDER talking to you on the phone but judging from what you’re saying, you could be a raving mad lunatic prowling the streets of Chow Kit for all I know, so, I am not going out with you. Bye”

Hui-Yor….I tell you. My blood boiling until I wanna pengsan!

This should teach me (and you) something. Even toy stores are not safe….don’t let your kids go to Pasar Malam alone! There are a bunch of our citizens who came out of the wrong hole in their mother’s backside and act like they have shit for brains.

Damn ANGRY, man! Babe…….urgh! Nobody bloody calls me ‘babe’ until I ask them to or if they have a death wish!